The great manipulator

I would blog about turning over the BIG 3-3, but I need to talk about the manipulator in my life.

I've known it for a long time, but I didn't realize until I got pregnant again just how much of her wishes she would like to exert on my life.

She barely said congratulations. She has made it clear she thinks Beak needs to go to a day shift and that I need to quit school. I guess if we don't do those things, she isn't going to be happy about this pregnancy.

She doesn't ask how I'm feeling, she doesn't ask when I'm going to the doctor, she hasn't bought anything for the baby. I was only 6 weeks pregnant with E and she was buying things already. She called every day and wanted to know how I was. She wanted me to check in after every doctor appointment.

She's already dropping hints about me having my tubes tied. She says things like "they have 3 kids? Do you know how much money it takes just to feed and clothe kids today?" I haven't mentioned to her that I've decided in fact not to have my tubes tied. Clearly that would go over like a lead balloon.

The word hurt doesn't cover this one. Heartbroken? Sad? Crushed? And it only gets worse with time.

Bumper Sticker of the Day

"Would somebody please give Bush a blowjob so we could impeach him?"

My life for the next 9 days

So I'm working on that PhD thing. I can't remember exactly why I thought it was a good idea to start and I can only remember now that the reasons I'm trying to finish are E and the Bean & their future educational success (you know mom guilt - thier ability to go to college surely hinges on me completing this monster, right?)

I'm in the last two semesters of coursework (780 & 781) and essentially in these two classes you do your literature review (affectionately known as Chapter 2). The assignment for 780 is to review 25 articles related to your disseration topic and the assignment for 781 is the same but the goal is that you will complete more than a total of 50 and be done with your chapter 2.

OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've been stuck in research hell for the past few weeks...stressing out b/c I don't have a dissertation chair (essential to completion)....I'm pregnant....I have a 2 year old....I work....I'd like to see my husband sometime.....did I mention I'm starting to lose it?

In sum, the next 9 days I will devote every waking moment to the review of my dearly beloved 25 articles related to "gender and nursing"....essentially I'm looking at why men don't choose nursing (inspired by my hubby, of course) and to use my findings as a tool to enhance recruitment of men for the profession.

At least it sounds good.

Prayers friends, prayers.